A mother's recipe

This recipe for any cake has appeared in newspapers throughout the country (years ago).
I didn't author this, but added a few of my own personal touches.

Preheat oven; get out bowl, spoons, and ingredients. Spray pan, chop up nuts.
Remove 18 blocks and 7 toy cars from kitchen table.


Measure 2 C. flour, remove Tate's hand from flour, wash flour off him.
Measure 1 more C. of flour to replace flour on floor.


Put flour, baking powder, and salt in sifter. Get another bowl. Answer doorbell.


Return to kitchen. Remove Sadie's hands from bowl. Wash Sadie. Get out egg. Answer phone. Return. Take out greased pan. Remove 1/4 in. salt from pan. Look for Tate. Get another pan and grease it. Accidentally walk past computer when you hear the dryer beep, then check blogs & emails.


Return to kitchen and find Tate; remove his hands from bowl; wash shortening, etc., etc., off him. Take up greased pan and find 1/4 in. layer of nutshells in it. Head for Tate, who flees, knocking bowl off table.


Wash kitchen floor. Wash table. Wash Walls. Wash dishes. Make note to pick up store bought cake.
Lie down and put on movie for kids.